Sunday, November 13, 2005

sex education 16


In the recent 2005 Durex Global Sex Survey, Malaysians overwhelmingly picked the toilet as the preferred place for shagging outside a bedroom. In view of this prevalent practice, Dua Sen presents the definitive guide to toilet bonking... Where:Recommended:• Unisex toilets: Beach Club, Passion, Loft, Thai Club, Liquid KL • Spacious toilets: Imbi Food Court, KL, Press Club of KL.• Lonely toilets: Shell Station, Batu 13 Ulu Langat. • Artistic toilets: Pudu Complex (excellent erotic graffiti on doors). Not recommended:• Rajooz Curry House PJ - Stack of dirty dishes inside.• The Mall KL - The doors are about 3 or 4 feet high.• Boutique Toilet KLCC - Will people who won't pay for a room pay RM 4 for a toilet?• LRT Stations - Gadget mounted to prevent squatting over bowl hinders smooth sex.• Zouk KL - Bouncers get upset. • Toilets for the handicapped - Peter Tan gets really upset. Precautions: • Due to the foul smell in most of our public toilets, it is advisable to SKIP foreplay.• Bring along an aerosol can of air freshener and flush BEFORE sex. • KEEP handbag safely around neck as snatch thieves strike from adjacent cubicles. • Most of the cheap porcelain break easily, so go EASY on the acrobatics.• Some toilets/cubicles come with built-in urinals. They usually stink. DO NOT push your partner's head in that direction. Positions: While most (understandably) prefer an oral quickie, many copulating positions are possible depending on your dexterity and state of desperation...

Kitty Style

Bhangra Style

Lazy Style

Handbag About To Be Stolen StylePolitically-correct androgynous mannequin illustrations by Johnny Ong.© 2005 TV SMITH Link to this article: See also: SEX PLEASE, WE'RE MALAYSIANS PEEPING TANS

No comments: